Thursday, March 1, 2012

I am impatience defined.

Everyone struggles with being impatient. Everyone. Do not correct me if I'm wrong.

Some struggle more than others. I'm in the "more" category.

Lately God has really been "encouraging" me to work on this issue. I always try to avoid asking Him to help me be patient because we all know what that leads to... But it has gotten to the point where I've had to give in and straight up ask for it. I use the phrase "supernatural patience" hoping that God will get the hint that I need Him to do it all by Himself, because I just get in the way.

Seriously, every stinkin' time that God gives me an opportunity to practice patience, I fail. Fail. Fail.

Today, I was losing my patience with my impatience.

But tonight, I had a victory! A hugely miniscule victory! An annoyingly humbling victory.

I was driving home from Bible study (of all places) and I got stopped at the first light. Then I got stopped at the next light. Then there was a train at a crossing that I didn't even think was still in use. And I, for no reason at all, had to get home as soon as possible.

But God seems to have heard that sneaky word, "supernatural," because as I approached the flashing lights at the train tracks, I felt calm. My impatience was melting away at an alarming rate. And I found myself enjoying just sitting quietly, eating my apple, enjoying the peace.

While getting stopped at lights doesn't always set off my impatience, tonight it was. (Trains almost always do! Can I get an amen??) After the train passed and I drove through two green lights, it hit me that God had given me a victory. A tiny, but monumental victory. I was well on my way to getting mad and went the opposite direction by the grace of God.

I needed that tiny victory to prove that God and I can have many more in much bigger situations! I spent the next several minutes thanking God with joy in my heart.

There's a long road ahead, but I'm finally on it!

Everyone must be quick to hear, slow to speak, and slow to anger; for the anger of man does not achieve the righteousness of God. James 1:19-20

1 comment:

  1. I used to feel that way at trains and then I started keeping a Sudoku puzzle and pencil on the glove compartment dash of the van and whenever I get stopped, I grab my pencil and start working on the puzzle. Now, most times when the train passes, I'm not ready to put my pencil down and go!


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