And scary. I mean, my kids' educational life wholly depends on me! Oh wait, their whole lives wholly depend on me right now...
But no on both counts. Not really. Because of this -
These tasks that God has entrusted to me - wife, mom, teacher - are literally impossible to do well. Impossible to do at all without my regularly scheduled meltdowns. BUT GOD (who is so rich in mercy and loves me so much! Eph. 2:4), He's got it.
I feel so much pressure as a homeschool mom to make sure that my kids are super smart. Marie is in 1st grade but is still really struggling with reading. And I feel like a complete failure. I just look at her homeschool notebook and cry out to God for help. It's gotten to be automatic.
The last few weeks as I've seriously questioned my call to homeschool these babes, God has almost immediately brought something about to remind me that He has called me to this. He won't leave me short-handed. It's been random things like an article with simple steps to teach anyone how to read, in the midst of being almost in tears from the daunting task. Or the quote above, the morning after an intense desire to throw in the towel. Or this verse when I simply needed it most...
Or hearing Marie say the other day for the first time... "I love to read!"
Homeschooling is hard. But oh so rewarding! The greatest rewards of all? Becoming more and more dependent on my God and Savior each day. Finding rest and peace in Him alone. And thoroughly enjoying His gifts of my babies and getting to raise them in His Word every day.