Revive

Have you heard?? Revival is HERE. 

Friday night we were tasked with giving away this bracelet on Saturday. 

I thought, how am I going to do that? I am going to be home all day until the Tim Hawkins concert at our church. When am I going to see an unsaved person to share this with?

Well...

Last night Derek and I enjoyed a date to see Tim Hawkins.

((BIG thank you to E&R for watching all of our babes, and to my Dadda for nabbing us amazing seats since we were super late as usual!))

We decided to go to Honey's for dessert. Apparently as we were walking in, Derek was wrestling with whether or not to remind me about the bracelet. He decided not to. I didn't even think of it until I saw a couple walk in and smiled at them. Suddenly, God rubbed some "eyesalve" on my eyes and I started to see people. I found a table that was in the midst of the busy little place and sat. 

And waited.

And watched.

The couple I had smiled at earlier sat down at a large table next to mine.

I noticed the table I was sitting at had some ice cream on it so I wiped it up and had to walk to the front of the store to throw the napkin away. In that few seconds, a group of teenagers took my table.

So I sat with this couple. They talked first. They had a blond haired, blue eyed boy named Jack with them. (Coincidence??) Derek came shortly after and asked how we could pray for them. 

In the end, I was able to hand over my bracelet, pray for them, get contact info, and now they are interested in visiting our church.

"Divine appointment" truly is what happened. I had absolutely nothing to do with any of it. The Spirit used me because He could. I wasn't nervous. I wasn't stressed about what to say or how to say it. 

That is supernatural.

These souls are so precious to God, and with the power of the Holy Spirit, I saw those souls as precious to God and they became precious to me.

Oh, and this is just the tip of all that God is doing just in my family! Derek… he is a new man. He is the spiritual leader in this family and is charging ahead with hope, joy, passion! 

And Marie?? {sigh} God is moving in her tiny heart. A few days ago she declared somewhat out of the blue: 

"I BELIEVE IN JESUS"

She has always said she does but this was different. She just felt the need to let me know. So later I shared with her about when I got saved and walked her through the bracelet. At the end of all that she mentioned one of Derek's friends saying, "We need to tell [soandso] about Jesus because he doesn't believe in Jesus." And she couldn't wait to give her bff next door a bracelet and tell her about Jesus! I don't know if she is eternally secure yet, but I have so much peace when I used to feel a desperate urgency. 

What an incredible week we've had. And it's only just begun…

Homeschooling is hard.

And scary. I mean, my kids' educational life wholly depends on me! Oh wait, their whole lives wholly depend on me right now...

But no on both counts. Not really. Because of this -

These tasks that God has entrusted to me - wife, mom, teacher - are literally impossible to do well. Impossible to do at all without my regularly scheduled meltdowns. BUT GOD (who is so rich in mercy and loves me so much! Eph. 2:4), He's got it.

I feel so much pressure as a homeschool mom to make sure that my kids are super smart. Marie is in 1st grade but is still really struggling with reading. And I feel like a complete failure. I just look at her homeschool notebook and cry out to God for help. It's gotten to be automatic.

The last few weeks as I've seriously questioned my call to homeschool these babes, God has almost immediately brought something about to remind me that He has called me to this. He won't leave me short-handed. It's been random things like an article with simple steps to teach anyone how to read, in the midst of being almost in tears from the daunting task. Or the quote above, the morning after an intense desire to throw in the towel. Or this verse when I simply needed it most...

Or hearing Marie say the other day for the first time... "I love to read!"

Homeschooling is hard. But oh so rewarding! The greatest rewards of all? Becoming more and more dependent on my God and Savior each day. Finding rest and peace in Him alone. And thoroughly enjoying His gifts of my babies and getting to raise them in His Word every day.

Honesty Day 7

Yay! Last day! Phew.

As if I haven't revealed enough about myself, this post is simply a list of random realness…

~I put on a particular tank top on Wednesday morning. I did not take it off until this morning.
~This means I did not shower or workout any of those days.
~Yes, I slept in it.
~Kempton ate Ritz crackers for dinner last week… twice.
~Today, I ate enough dark chocolate chips to give myself a stomach ache.
~I always brush my teeth in the morning. But almost never brush them at night.
~I worry.
~I'm selfish
~I'm scared of stink bugs. I've had nightmares. And I shiver every time I see one.
~I am very bad with names. And sometimes faces.
~I have a small pile of tshirts that I've been keeping for their sentimental value.
~I have a temper.
~I read the whole Twilight Series in 3 days (the movies are horrid).
~I also read the Divergent series in 3 days but that's significantly less embarrassing.
~Our schoolroom is so messy, we've been doing school in the kitchen.
~I rarely clean the kitchen before going to bed.
~I only brush Marie's hair when absolutely necessary.
~I often forget to brush my own hair.
~Sometimes I let the kids eat on the floor in the living room in front of their TV.
~My carpet is very dirty as a result.

Now that you know way more than you wanted to know about me…

I hope this whole experiment was encouraging to at least some of you! I'm glad it's over :)

Though painful, only honesty with God and others will enable the Christian to walk in purity and power. -Jim Elliff

Nothing can enter heaven which is not real; nothing erroneous, mistaken, conceited, hollow, professional, pretentious, insubstantial, can be smuggled through the gates. Only truth can dwell with the God of truth. -C.H. Spurgeon 

Honesty Day 6

I waste so much time.

I am plenty busy with 4 kids and homeschooling and everything else we do. Some days I feel like I'm going nonstop and still am getting nothing done. It's a hamster wheel kinda life sometimes.

But it is amazing how much time I still manage to waste. I would probably have a much cleaner house if I didn't get on Facebook multiple times a day. Evenings are the worst because I'm tired and have no desire to be productive. So I'll sit around and do nothing til much too late in the night.

Honestly, it's stupid.

There is a time to waste time...

Oh how I love snuggling and playing with my RJ as if time stood still. He usually only nurses for 10-15 minutes but I have been known to sit on the couch with him for much longer just enjoying his giggles and squishing his cheeks. I mean really, who could resist such adorableness? Totally time worth wasting.

It's never wasted time with these crazies! I should "waste" more time on them...

It certainly wouldn't hurt to waste more time on my soulmate.

The time wasting I'm confessing to here is the kind that keeps me up late at night just scrolling through Facebook, watching Netflix, eating. It's usually after the kids go to bed and sometimes I really just need the downtime. But maybe going to bed earlier would be a much better use of my time! And tonight, some time in the Word since I haven't gotten to that yet today.

I believe in downtime. I believe in some "wasted" time being good. But honestly I simply waste too much time.

Lord, help me to give of the time you've blessed me with in such a way that is pleasing to You. Teach me to number my days that I might get a heart of wisdom.

Honesty Day 5

Honesty isn't really a struggle for me (you can tell that by now, right?). The main reason for posting these days of honesty is to bring to and encourage realness in social media. It's an old discussion but still a relevant one… we post only the pretty stuff so people will think only the best of us.

I'm so very guilty of  it, too -
bragging about all the awesome things my kids do and conveniently leaving out the not so good stuff…
making sure the background of every picture is cleared of all the random debri (batman undies anyone?)...
posting all about our awesome trip to this place or that, and conveniently being quiet during all the many days of doing absolutely nothing…
and don't forget about those workout posts, the ones that come once every couple of weeks leading you to believe that I work out all the time when really I probably haven't worked out at all in between pics…
all those things I managed to accomplish today that I wrote all about in my Facebook status? It was more than I've accomplished in an entire week, I did absolutely nothing but stuff my face with peanut butter and dark chocolate chips the rest of the day, and I yelled at my kids the whole time…

Here's the honesty part: the problem is not with these rose-colored posts. We probably shouldn't be laying out all of our dirty laundry for the whole world to see anyway (oops!).

 I think the problem is in our (my!) response to others' posts of their "perfect" lives.

When I see someone post a picture of their feet propped up with a hot cup of something delicious in their hand, and a candle burning on the clean coffee table, and not a speck of clutter in sight, I get jealous. It would take me all day to set up a pic like that!

Another post that tends to prick my jealousy bone is seeing pictures of moms with all their kids doing super fun (and of course educational!) things. I start to feel like a horrible mom for not wanting to leave the house and feel stress just thinking about doing those things!

I told Derek the other day that I want to be a family who "does stuff" together. His response: "We do do stuff together." And he's so very right. It's not always glamorous or even post-worthy, and sometimes our "doing stuff" is nothing more than just being together, but I'm working on being truly content no matter what others' lives look like on Facebook.

This is the day that the Lord has made! I will rejoice and be glad in it! Psalm 118:24

O God, I beg two favors from you; let me have them before I die. First, help me never to tell a lie. Second, give me neither poverty nor riches! Give me just enough to satisfy my needs. Proverbs 30:7-8